Dearest Evie,
It's been the Best Summer Ever! You are the only one who can truly appreciate the level of irony I feel when I say that phrase. My mother came to visit.
'What are you wearing' that was the first thing that she said to me, she hadn't seen me for about three years, as you know Evie, I have come to manage without her. But the negative comments that is something that I am unable to this day to be able to accept. There was no sign of affection, kiss on the cheek or hug, though I can only imagine what those relationships are like between mother and daughter. Although I could refer to yours and Mrs Crowing, when I see you both together, I hope you don't mind me saying this I feel a tinge of jealously and pain.
She wasn't making comments over my house 'Why have you got this?' or looking disapprovingly around that cushion that I have, which has a flower on it. She doesn't like that Evie, and I knew she wouldn't, I suppose that's why I brought it, because she feels that cushions are to be 'plain and simple', those being here words.
I so wanted to skype you, but you weren't there, and I could imagine that you went to a fabulous shopping trip with your mum, while she was picking on my cooking. 'Joanna this chicken doesn't have enough salt, it's not cooked properly'. Whilst she would yes you guessed it do it all over again, and I know she does make it much better than me, but its her way of making me feel that I am inadequate!
But it's not just the jibes and the negative remarks, she doesn't approve of you either Evie, though I didn't imagine that she would. 'Why don't you get yourself a nice man, this really has been enough, with you and that....Girl now Joanna'. She was crying when she said that Evie, yes tears, emotional blackmail, looking at me, making me feel that I have done something really wrong by falling in love with you. But I told her as best as I can 'Mum she is my girlfriend, and I am going to marry her'. You know what she said 'Joanna...My God I will die if you do'. Then she left.
Evie I wanted to hear your voice, to touch and kiss you. I miss you. I know that Mrs Crowling took it well, but I knew that my mother would never approve, so I have lost her forever. My mother has left me, though I suppose she was never really there in the first place was she?
Love you always, come back from your holiday soon
Joanna! xxx
It's been the Best Summer Ever! You are the only one who can truly appreciate the level of irony I feel when I say that phrase. My mother came to visit.
'What are you wearing' that was the first thing that she said to me, she hadn't seen me for about three years, as you know Evie, I have come to manage without her. But the negative comments that is something that I am unable to this day to be able to accept. There was no sign of affection, kiss on the cheek or hug, though I can only imagine what those relationships are like between mother and daughter. Although I could refer to yours and Mrs Crowing, when I see you both together, I hope you don't mind me saying this I feel a tinge of jealously and pain.
She wasn't making comments over my house 'Why have you got this?' or looking disapprovingly around that cushion that I have, which has a flower on it. She doesn't like that Evie, and I knew she wouldn't, I suppose that's why I brought it, because she feels that cushions are to be 'plain and simple', those being here words.
I so wanted to skype you, but you weren't there, and I could imagine that you went to a fabulous shopping trip with your mum, while she was picking on my cooking. 'Joanna this chicken doesn't have enough salt, it's not cooked properly'. Whilst she would yes you guessed it do it all over again, and I know she does make it much better than me, but its her way of making me feel that I am inadequate!
But it's not just the jibes and the negative remarks, she doesn't approve of you either Evie, though I didn't imagine that she would. 'Why don't you get yourself a nice man, this really has been enough, with you and that....Girl now Joanna'. She was crying when she said that Evie, yes tears, emotional blackmail, looking at me, making me feel that I have done something really wrong by falling in love with you. But I told her as best as I can 'Mum she is my girlfriend, and I am going to marry her'. You know what she said 'Joanna...My God I will die if you do'. Then she left.
Evie I wanted to hear your voice, to touch and kiss you. I miss you. I know that Mrs Crowling took it well, but I knew that my mother would never approve, so I have lost her forever. My mother has left me, though I suppose she was never really there in the first place was she?
Love you always, come back from your holiday soon
Joanna! xxx
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